


Come Morning

by kuro49



Category: Pacific Rim (2013)
Genre: Drift Side Effects, Father/Son Incest, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-25
Updated: 2015-07-25
Packaged: 2018-04-11 02:52:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4418294
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kuro49/pseuds/kuro49
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He is always going to love this boy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Come Morning

**Author's Note:**

> Reposting this from [tumblr](http://setsailslash.tumblr.com/post/124735441241/awww-write-morning-after-guilt-pleaseee) when an anon prodded me to write some morning after guilt trip, largely inspired by [this amazing hansencest fanart by acwalevale](http://acwalevale.tumblr.com/post/124608862419/i-will-regret-it-in-the-morning). :DD

iv.

Chuck wakes up to an empty bed that leads to an empty room. He wakes up in his old man’s bunk, and that makes up for a lot of fever dreams he’s had in the wake of a drift.

He sits at the edge of the bed, halting in pulling a worn grey tee halfway over his head.

He is on the edge, alone in his head.

This registers, late, like he is not meant to have impressions of another man pressing outwards. Like he is much emptier without another mind to fill in the spaces meant just for himself, all alone in these dark days.

For them, a drift hangover has never passed in one night.

Still, he is more pissed that his old man took his dog along than leave him with all the dirty sheets to deal with.

 

i.

They are at the height of their post drift blues when he finally gives in.

He is probably stronger than this but this fight has been a long one, and he is not a better man. Herc might not give that final inch, closing that last breath of distance between them, but he gives him this. Turning a palm to cradle the line of his jaw, he tilts his head to him, and it is probably not fair at all to make Chuck the one to walk that last step to him.

Even with him here. He is in his head, he is in his blood.

The world isn’t about to deal either one of them a fair hand.

There are some things a father cannot do.

 

v.

Chuck finds him in the morning light, overlooking the harbour.

Max barks before the old man registers a thing, caught in the way the waves would crash against the side of the 'dome. Chuck wants to call out _good boy_ if that last word isn’t already carved under his skin. His father turns, looking like he hasn’t slept. Even though they both know just how well he did.

“There’s no hangover.”

Chuck speaks with a murmur, low, like this makes up for the bruises he made and the love bites he left.

On another day, Chuck thinks he might mock the man at the way he stills, like he is only realizing this now. Like Herc has had nothing but thoughts of him filling up all the spaces in his head even when Chuck is finally gone.

“…Is this what that is?” Herc smiles, faint. _I almost forgot._

At least there is one good thing to come of this.

 

ii.

Herc slides his eyes shut, and it is nowhere as vivid as a live drift.

It comes close, cast in the shadows of their room, the filtered light from the bathroom. With his bunk beneath their combined weight, Herc sees himself in Chuck’s eyes.

It’s not sweet, how Chuck sees him, but he isn’t so viscerally angry. And if this is forgiveness in a sense, Herc can wear away that last scarce hope that the man Angela married still remains.

The guilt is there, set in stone, but it is muted by that first moment.

That very first brush of his mouth to his where he imagines him to be anyone else. He knows, he always does.

He is always going to love this boy.

 

iii.

It is not forgiveness, how Chuck bites into the kiss that starts as one and dissolves into another and another when Herc opens up to him with a draw of a sigh of a breath. It is not forgiveness when he hasn’t been angry for a long time now.

And if Chuck is falling a little bit in love, that too will eventually wash out and into their drift.

The number of times he gets inside his head adds up, and it is not going down.

This is how he keeps him close, in his thoughts and in his heart and all the other crevices that fade in the immediacy of a fight. It is how the remaining pilot of Lucky Seven comes to Kodiak Island for a pick at his next co-pilot among the recruits.

When his father calls out _next_ , he steps up.

He gives in to that final pull.

He always does.

 

XXX Kuro


End file.
